Yes, you should JUST DO IT

I finally got finished with my cases today and I think it's worth a blog.

We've been trying to accomplish everything for almost a year now. Today is particularly eventful. First off, I went to school to pick up my remaining case forms from my classmates who got them signed. I thought I already had everything but there was one missing. We looked for it but to no avail. I decided to just reprint it and have it signed myself. As I rode a jeepney, some woman with a baby boarded the vehicle and sat near me. She was wearing a really short shorts and had a lot of lesions on her thigh up to her feet. How could anyone miss it when it's there for everyone to see? All of the people who got in after her did not want to sit beside her. I admit I am one of them and so when she kept on sliding beside me I alighted from the jeep. When I got off, I hurriedly poured what alcohol I have to my outer thigh up to my legs. My pants was soaking wet when I got on another jeep. The other passengers might have found it really weird but I wouldn't risk getting the skin problem. I mean, I already have a lot going on my skin I DO NOT WANT TO ADD ANY MORE. The first thing I did when I got home was change my pants, clean my thigh and leg which I consider to have been "in contact" with the woman's skin. I was tempted to use some antibiotics I have lying around but I decided not to.

I ate lunch before I headed out again to have my missing and reprinted case form signed again. Going to the Philippines General Hospital, the fastest way to go is to ride the LRT. That's 23php off my pocket. I arrived earlier than I had expected but it was fine since I ended up going in circles in that hospital. My classmates said that the trauma ward was ward 8 but I was certain that ward 8 was the orthopedic ward. I first looked for ward 8 and guess what? I was right. Dang it...I had to go to the other side and tried my luck at the Delivery Room. Tired of walking, I just asked some personnel inside and they directed me to ward 14a, trauma ward. Finally, I got there looking all exhausted and there were a lot of people waiting for a certain doctor. I approached the nurses' station and didn't recognize my instructor right away. She was wearing her hair differently and had her glasses on. She sounded a little irritated and told me to wait for 30 minutes. I obliged but I had to wait for an hour before she was finished with endorsement and all. I got my papers signed at half past three. Rushing, I headed for school.

Good heavens! My luck hadn't run out. I easily spotted a jeepney that would pass through my destination. I boarded the jeep and as I look out the window, I saw another "Just Do It" sign by Nike. I guess that makes it the 4th time since I started reviewing. It seems that it appears once a month as a reminder. I don't know what I shoujd "Just Do" though.

Anyway, when I got to school, there were loads of people crowding the office. I lined up my paper for our college secretary's signature. Upon getting that done, the other officials said they wouldn't be accepting anymore papers so I just went out and spotted my friends on the hallway. They were discussing some problems regarding missing case forms. I stayed and listened for a while. I was one of the victims but their case was worse. As we talk, they said that the fee had gone down and there were still some people at the office so I went to see what was going on. And...STRIKE! They were still getting papers signed. I gave them mine and waited for hours for it to get done. I was getting really impatient since I have opened lesson slots that day. I can't afford to get late and get another penalty. The remaining people there and I had to go through a lot of hurdles to get everything as fast as we can. At 6:00, we finally got hold of everything. I accompanied one of my batchmates on the way out, rode on the same vehicle, and saw her off at her stop. She wasn't really used to going home alone at night at that hour and it was already dark! I guess we owe it to the "-ber" months.

My feet almost grew wings as I hurried home. Another thanks to God, my first lesson was left opened and I still have time to close it without incurring any violation of the rules. I got to eat and rest even for a while.

So my night went as it always does, a lesson, a little read, and then sleep.

It's just that I realized that if I didn't have the patience to wait to have my missing case signed, all my case form released, and to endure the long ride home, I would still have a lot going on in my mind. I guess sometimes, especially when you're having some doubts, you should JUST DO IT!

Stress must be piling up

Recently,  a lot of things are coming in to my mind. Sometimes it's related to my studies, other times to my social needs. 

Let me just rant again here in a world where I can just bare my feelings and shout them out loud without being mindful of how people would think. 

As I type using my phone, these are what's going through my head:

• Why in the world is my self-esteem this low? I've been really insecure the past days. I see how better my classmates are in our review but I am not satisfied with how I'm doing. I see how my friends are growing up and startrting to become adults but here I am, still shut-in in the comforts of my own world. I see how some of them are entering phases appropriate for our development but here I am, still a kid refusing to grow up. I am going to be responsible for someone's life soon so how can I act and feel like this?
• Am I really feeling the weight of the career I chose? I still couldn't give up my addictions...anime. Some may view it childish but for some reason, I can't stop. It's become an opioid for me. I need to focus. I need to concentrate. I just can't get by without even a single episode in a day.
• Why am I burdened with so many skin problems and not enough financial capacity to seek treatment. I had a major breakout of acne when I started reviewing. It's probably one of the contributing factors for my first problem. I hate it when people point it out...It's obvious that I am aware of my condition better than anyone. I need treatment but cannot afford one.
• Is it just me or whenever I try to befriend others, they just toss me aside when more of my other friends comes into the scene? I have joined and even founded some groups but I always end up being the odd one out. A situation like this was when I introduced a friend to a certain group and she ended up being called for more, beung sought out more, invited  more, and they even spend more time together. This is not limited to one friend...there was a lot of them. Am I really that hard to be friends with?

Well, my eyes are giving up on me, as well as my phone. Just understand these outburst of random thoughts since I can't really express them in person...maybe someday I will be able to...